NLP: The Essential Guide to Neuro-Linguistic Programming 2020

by Joseph O'Connor & Ian McDermott

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Summary:

  • NLP: The Essential Guide to Neuro-Linguistic Programming by Joseph OConnor & Ian McDermott is an introduction to the field of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). NLP is a set of techniques and tools used for understanding how people think, communicate, and interact. It can be used in many different areas such as business, education, health care, relationships, sports performance and more. This book provides an overview of the history and development of NLP as well as its core principles. It also explains how to use NLP in practical ways with examples from real life situations.

    The book begins by introducing readers to the concept of NLP and explaining why it has become so popular over recent years. It then goes on to discuss some key concepts such as communication models, sensory acuity and representational systems which are essential for understanding how people process information. After this there is a section dedicated to exploring specific techniques that can be used when working with clients or groups including anchoring, reframing and submodalities.

    The authors then move on to look at applications for using NLP in various contexts such as business management or personal development. They provide detailed explanations about how these techniques can be applied effectively along with case studies showing their successful implementation in practice. Finally they conclude by discussing ethical considerations when using NLP.

    Overall this book provides an excellent introduction into the world of Neuro-Linguistic Programming for those who are new to the subject matter or want a refresher course on its fundamentals. With clear explanations about each topic covered along with plenty of examples from real life scenarios it makes learning about this fascinating area easy yet comprehensive.


Main ideas:


  • #1.     Introduction to NLP: Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is a set of tools and techniques used to understand and influence behavior and communication. It is based on the idea that the language we use and the way we think are connected, and that by understanding this connection, we can use language to influence our own and others’ behavior.

    NLP is a powerful tool for understanding and influencing behavior. It can be used to help people become more effective communicators, better problem solvers, and more successful in their personal and professional lives. NLP focuses on the connection between language, thought processes, and behavior. By recognizing patterns of communication that are associated with certain behaviors or outcomes, we can use language to influence our own thoughts and actions as well as those of others.

    At its core, NLP is about understanding how the mind works so that we can use it to our advantage. It involves learning how to recognize patterns in language that indicate underlying beliefs or values which may be driving someone’s behavior. Once these patterns have been identified they can then be changed or modified in order to create desired results.

    NLP also teaches us how to communicate effectively by using specific techniques such as reframing statements into positive ones; mirroring body language; asking open-ended questions; listening actively; providing feedback without judgement; being aware of nonverbal cues such as facial expressions and tone of voice; setting clear boundaries when communicating with others; using humor appropriately etc.

    In short, NLP provides an invaluable set of tools for improving communication skills both personally and professionally. With practice anyone can learn how to use these tools effectively in order to achieve greater success in life.

  • #2.     Representational Systems: Representational systems are the ways in which we process information. NLP uses these systems to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Representational systems are the ways in which we process information. They include visual, auditory, kinesthetic (feeling), olfactory (smell) and gustatory (taste). NLP uses these systems to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior. By understanding how someone processes information through their representational system of choice, it is possible to tailor communication so that it resonates with them more effectively.

    For example, if someone prefers a visual representation of information they may respond better when presented with diagrams or pictures rather than words alone. Similarly, an auditory person may prefer verbal explanations over written ones. Knowing what type of representational system someone prefers can help you create messages that will be more easily understood by them.

    NLP also looks at the way different representational systems interact with each other. For instance, some people use all five senses when processing information while others rely heavily on one or two particular senses. Understanding this can help you craft your message in such a way as to make sure it reaches its intended audience.

  • #3.     Submodalities: Submodalities are the finer details of our representational systems. NLP uses these to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Submodalities are the finer details of our representational systems. They refer to the qualities and characteristics that make up our internal representations, such as size, brightness, location in space, distance from us or others, speed of movement and so on. NLP uses these submodalities to understand how people think and communicate with each other. By understanding how someones thoughts are structured we can gain insight into their behavior and motivations.

    NLP also uses submodalities to influence behavior by changing a persons internal representation of an experience or event. For example, if someone has a negative memory associated with public speaking they may be able to reduce its intensity by making it smaller in their mind’s eye or moving it further away from them. This technique is known as ‘reframing’ and can help people overcome fears or phobias.

    Submodalities are powerful tools for understanding ourselves better and influencing our own behavior as well as that of others. By learning more about them we can become more aware of how we think about things which will enable us to make positive changes in our lives.

  • #4.     Anchoring: Anchoring is a technique used to create a positive emotional state in a person. It involves associating a positive emotion with a physical stimulus, such as a touch or a sound.

    Anchoring is a powerful tool used in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) to create positive emotional states. It involves associating a physical stimulus, such as a touch or sound, with an emotion. This technique can be used to help people access and maintain positive emotions when they need them most. For example, if someone is feeling anxious before giving a presentation, they could use anchoring to associate the feeling of calmness with the sound of their own voice saying “I am confident”.

    The process of anchoring begins by creating an anchor point – this could be anything from touching your thumb and forefinger together to making a specific gesture or even repeating certain words out loud. Once you have established your anchor point, it’s time to link it up with the desired emotion. To do this you must first bring yourself into that state – for instance if you want to feel more confident then think about times when you felt really good about yourself and focus on those feelings.

    Once you are in that state of mind then activate your anchor point while focusing on those feelings until they become associated with each other. You can test whether it has worked by activating the anchor again and seeing if the same emotion comes back quickly and easily.

    Anchoring is an incredibly useful tool for anyone looking to improve their emotional wellbeing or performance levels in any area of life. By linking physical stimuli with positive emotions we can tap into these resources whenever we need them most.

  • #5.     Reframing: Reframing is a technique used to change the way a person perceives a situation. It involves changing the context of a situation, or the way it is framed, in order to change the way a person responds to it.

    Reframing is a powerful tool for changing the way we think about and respond to situations. By reframing, we can shift our perspective on an issue or problem, allowing us to see it in a new light and come up with creative solutions. Reframing involves looking at the same situation from different angles, exploring alternative interpretations of events, and considering how different people might view the same situation differently.

    For example, if you are feeling overwhelmed by a task that seems too difficult to complete, reframing could help you break down the task into smaller steps that seem more manageable. Or if you feel like your efforts have been unappreciated by someone else, reframing could help you look at their behavior from another point of view – perhaps they were just having a bad day or didn’t understand what was expected of them.

    Reframing can also be used as part of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). NLP is based on the idea that language has power over our thoughts and feelings; therefore by changing our language patterns we can change how we perceive things. Through reframing techniques such as “reframe questions” or “reframe statements” we can alter our internal dialogue so that it reflects more positive thinking patterns.

    In summary, reframing is an effective technique for shifting perspectives and finding creative solutions to problems. It allows us to explore alternative interpretations of events while considering how others may view them differently. Additionally, when used in conjunction with NLP techniques such as “reframe questions” or “reframe statements” it helps us create more positive thought patterns which ultimately lead to better outcomes.

  • #6.     Strategies: Strategies are the mental processes we use to achieve a goal. NLP uses strategies to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Strategies are the mental processes we use to achieve a goal. NLP is an effective tool for understanding how people think and communicate, and for influencing their behavior. It helps us identify patterns in our thinking that can be used to create positive change. By recognizing these patterns, we can develop strategies that will help us reach our goals more effectively.

    NLP uses techniques such as modeling, reframing, anchoring and chunking to understand how people process information and make decisions. Through this understanding of human behavior, NLP practitioners can develop strategies that will enable them to influence others in a positive way. For example, by using reframing techniques they can help someone see a situation from another perspective or by using anchoring they can help someone stay focused on achieving their goals.

    By developing effective strategies with NLP tools, individuals are able to better manage their thoughts and emotions so they can take action towards reaching their desired outcomes. This allows them to become more successful in whatever endeavor they choose – whether it’s personal development or professional success.

  • #7.     Beliefs: Beliefs are the ideas and values we hold about ourselves and the world. NLP uses beliefs to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Beliefs are powerful forces that shape our lives. They influence how we think, feel, and act in the world. NLP recognizes this power and uses it to help people understand their own beliefs and those of others. By understanding these beliefs, we can better communicate with each other and create positive change in our lives.

    NLP helps us identify our core beliefs about ourselves, the world around us, and how we interact with it. It also teaches us how to recognize when a belief is limiting or unhelpful so that we can replace it with something more empowering or constructive. Through this process of self-discovery, NLP enables us to gain greater insight into ourselves as well as others.

    By recognizing the power of beliefs in shaping behavior, NLP provides an effective tool for influencing people’s thoughts and actions. This makes it a valuable resource for anyone looking to improve communication skills or make lasting changes in their life.

  • #8.     Values: Values are the things we consider important in life. NLP uses values to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Values are the core beliefs and principles that guide our behavior. They shape how we think, feel, and act in any given situation. NLP uses values to understand how people think and communicate, as well as to influence their behavior. By understanding a persons values, it is possible to identify what motivates them and use this knowledge to help them achieve their goals.

    NLP practitioners can also use values-based language patterns when communicating with others. This involves using words or phrases that evoke positive emotions associated with certain values in order to encourage desired behaviors or outcomes. For example, if someone wants another person to take action on something they have been procrastinating on, they could phrase it in terms of the value of achievement by saying “You’ll be proud of yourself once you finish this task!”

    By recognizing the importance of values in communication and decision making processes, NLP provides an effective way for individuals and organizations alike to better understand themselves and those around them.

  • #9.     Metaphors: Metaphors are stories or images used to convey a message. NLP uses metaphors to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Metaphors are powerful tools for understanding and influencing the way people think, feel, and act. By using metaphors to convey a message or idea, we can help others to better understand our point of view. NLP uses metaphors as a way to gain insight into how people communicate with each other and how they interpret their environment. Through metaphor-based communication, NLP practitioners can identify patterns in language that reveal underlying beliefs and values.

    NLP also utilizes metaphors as a means of influencing behavior. By creating stories or images that evoke certain emotions or reactions from an individual, it is possible to influence their decisions and actions in positive ways. For example, if someone is feeling overwhelmed by stress at work, an NLP practitioner might use a metaphor about sailing on calm waters to encourage them to take some time off for relaxation.

    Metaphors are incredibly useful when it comes to Neuro-Linguistic Programming because they allow us to explore complex ideas without getting bogged down in technical details. They provide us with an easy way of conveying messages that have deep meaning while still being accessible enough for everyone involved in the conversation.

  • #10.     Outcome Thinking: Outcome thinking is a technique used to set and achieve goals. It involves setting a goal and then breaking it down into smaller, achievable steps.

    Outcome Thinking is a powerful technique used to set and achieve goals. It involves setting a goal, then breaking it down into smaller, achievable steps. This helps to ensure that the goal can be achieved in an efficient manner by focusing on each step along the way. Outcome Thinking also encourages creative problem solving and allows for flexibility when unexpected obstacles arise.

    The process of Outcome Thinking begins with defining what success looks like for your particular goal. Once you have identified this outcome, you can begin to break it down into smaller components or tasks that need to be completed in order to reach your desired result. By taking these individual tasks one at a time, you are able to focus on each step without getting overwhelmed by the entire project.

    Outcome Thinking also encourages creativity and innovation as you work towards achieving your goals. As new challenges arise during the process, this technique allows for flexibility so that solutions can be found quickly and efficiently without having to start from scratch again.

    Overall, Outcome Thinking is an effective tool for setting and achieving goals in any area of life. By breaking down larger objectives into manageable chunks, it makes them easier to accomplish while still allowing room for creativity and innovation throughout the journey.

  • #11.     Rapport: Rapport is a technique used to build trust and understanding between two people. It involves mirroring the other person’s body language and speaking in a similar way.

    Rapport is an important tool for building relationships and creating a sense of connection between two people. It involves mirroring the other person’s body language, such as posture, gestures, facial expressions and tone of voice. This helps to create a feeling of understanding and trust between the two individuals. Additionally, it can be helpful to use similar words or phrases when speaking with someone in order to further build rapport.

    When attempting to establish rapport with another person, it is important to remain aware of their reactions and adjust your behavior accordingly. If they seem uncomfortable or unresponsive then you should take this into account and modify your approach accordingly. Additionally, it is important not to overdo it; too much mirroring can come across as insincere or even creepy!

    Rapport is an invaluable skill that can help you build strong relationships with others quickly and effectively. With practice you will become more adept at reading people’s body language cues so that you can better understand how best to interact with them in order to create a positive connection.

  • #12.     Language Patterns: Language patterns are the words and phrases we use to communicate. NLP uses language patterns to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Language patterns are an important part of communication. They provide the structure and context for our conversations, allowing us to express ourselves in a meaningful way. NLP uses language patterns to understand how people think and communicate, as well as to influence their behavior. By analyzing language patterns, NLP practitioners can identify underlying beliefs and values that may be influencing someones decisions or actions.

    NLP also looks at the use of metaphors and stories in communication. Metaphors allow us to explain complex concepts in simple terms, while stories help us make sense of our experiences by providing a narrative framework for understanding them. Through careful analysis of these elements, NLP practitioners can gain insight into how people think about certain topics or situations.

    Finally, NLP examines the use of non-verbal cues such as body language and facial expressions when communicating with others. These subtle signals often convey more information than words alone can provide; by paying attention to them we can better understand what someone is really trying to say.

  • #13.     Eye Accessing Cues: Eye accessing cues are the movements of the eyes that indicate how a person is thinking. NLP uses these cues to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Eye accessing cues are an important part of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP). They refer to the movements of the eyes that indicate how a person is thinking. By observing these cues, NLP practitioners can gain insight into how people think and communicate, as well as influence their behavior.

    The eye accessing cues theory suggests that when we think about something, our eyes move in certain directions depending on what type of thought process we are engaging in. For example, if someone is recalling a memory from the past they may look up to their left; whereas if they are imagining something or creating a mental picture they may look up to their right. Similarly, looking down and to either side indicates internal dialogue or self-talk.

    By understanding these patterns of eye movement it is possible for NLP practitioners to identify which type of thought process someone is engaging in at any given moment. This knowledge can then be used to help them better understand how people think and communicate, as well as influence their behavior.

  • #14.     Subconscious Communication: Subconscious communication is the communication that takes place between two people without them being aware of it. NLP uses this to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Subconscious communication is a powerful tool that can be used to understand how people think and communicate, as well as influence their behavior. It involves the exchange of non-verbal cues between two people without them being aware of it. This type of communication can take place through body language, facial expressions, eye contact, tone of voice and other subtle signals. By understanding these signals we can gain insight into what someone is really thinking or feeling.

    NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) uses this form of communication to help us better understand ourselves and others. Through NLP techniques such as mirroring and matching we are able to pick up on the subtle cues that our subconscious mind sends out in order to create rapport with another person. We can also use NLP techniques to identify patterns in our own behavior so that we can make changes if necessary.

    By learning more about subconscious communication we are able to become more effective communicators and build stronger relationships with those around us. With practice, anyone can learn how to recognize these subtle signals and use them for their benefit.

  • #15.     Time Line Therapy: Time Line Therapy is a technique used to help people let go of negative emotions and beliefs. It involves visualizing a timeline of events and then changing the way the person perceives them.

    Time Line Therapy is a powerful technique used to help people let go of negative emotions and beliefs. It involves visualizing a timeline of events in the past, present, and future, and then changing the way the person perceives them. The goal is to create new perspectives on old experiences that can lead to more positive feelings about oneself.

    The process begins by having the client identify any negative emotions or limiting beliefs they may have. Once these are identified, they are asked to visualize their life as if it were a timeline stretching from birth until now. They will be guided through this visualization process so that they can see how each event has impacted their current state of being.

    Once this visualization is complete, Time Line Therapy helps clients reframe those events in order to gain insight into why certain patterns exist in their lives today. This allows them to make conscious decisions about how they want their future timelines to look like instead of repeating old patterns over again.

    By using Time Line Therapy techniques such as anchoring positive memories and creating affirmations for themselves, clients can begin replacing negative thoughts with more empowering ones which will ultimately lead them towards achieving greater success in all areas of life.

  • #16.     Parts Integration: Parts integration is a technique used to help people resolve inner conflicts. It involves identifying the different parts of the person and then helping them to work together.

    Parts integration is a powerful tool for helping people to resolve inner conflicts. It involves recognizing the different parts of the person and then working with them to create harmony and balance. The idea behind this technique is that each part of us has its own needs, wants, values, beliefs, and motivations. By understanding these different aspects of ourselves we can begin to work together in order to achieve our goals.

    The process begins by identifying all the different parts within us – such as our conscious mind, unconscious mind, emotions, body sensations etc. Once these have been identified it’s important to understand how they interact with one another and what their individual needs are. This helps us gain insight into why certain behaviours or reactions occur when faced with particular situations.

    Once we have an understanding of our various parts we can start integrating them together so that they work harmoniously towards achieving our desired outcome. This may involve using techniques such as visualisation or affirmations in order to help bring about change on a subconscious level. Ultimately this process allows us to become more aware of ourselves and make better decisions based on what will benefit all aspects of who we are.

  • #17.     Hypnosis: Hypnosis is a technique used to induce a trance-like state in a person. NLP uses hypnosis to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Hypnosis is a powerful tool used to induce an altered state of consciousness in which the subject is more open to suggestion. It can be used to help people overcome fears, phobias, and other psychological issues. NLP uses hypnosis as a way of understanding how people think and communicate, and influencing their behavior. Through hypnosis, practitioners are able to access the subconscious mind where they can identify patterns of thought that may be causing problems or limiting beliefs.

    NLP practitioners use hypnotic techniques such as guided imagery, visualization exercises, affirmations and positive self-talk to help clients make changes in their lives. Hypnotic suggestions are also used to create new neural pathways in the brain so that new behaviors become automatic responses rather than conscious decisions.

    The goal of using hypnosis with NLP is not only for therapeutic purposes but also for personal development. By accessing the subconscious mind through hypnosis it becomes possible for individuals to gain insight into themselves and develop greater awareness about their own thoughts and feelings.

  • #18.     Modeling: Modeling is a technique used to replicate the behavior of successful people. NLP uses modeling to understand how people think and communicate, and to influence their behavior.

    Modeling is a powerful tool used in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) to replicate the behavior of successful people. It involves studying how they think, communicate and act, and then using that knowledge to influence our own behavior. By understanding the patterns of success, we can learn from them and apply those same principles to our own lives.

    The process of modeling begins by observing someone who has achieved success in an area you want to improve upon. You look for their specific behaviors, language patterns, beliefs and values that have enabled them to be successful. Once you have identified these elements, you can begin replicating them yourself.

    For example, if you wanted to become more confident in public speaking situations like giving presentations or speeches at work or school events, you could observe someone who is already very good at it. Notice what words they use when talking about themselves or their topic; pay attention to their body language; take note of any techniques they use for calming nerves before going on stage; listen carefully for any stories or anecdotes they tell during their speech.

    By taking all this information into account and applying it yourself through practice and repetition over time – gradually building up your confidence – eventually you will be able to speak with ease in front of large audiences just like the person whose behavior was modeled.

  • #19.     Change Work: Change work is a technique used to help people make changes in their lives. It involves identifying the problem and then helping the person to find a solution.

    Change work is a powerful tool for helping people make positive changes in their lives. It involves identifying the problem and then working with the person to find a solution. The process begins by exploring what has been happening in the persons life, including any patterns or behaviors that may be contributing to the issue at hand. Once this exploration is complete, it is important to identify potential solutions and strategies for making those changes happen.

    The next step of change work involves creating an action plan that outlines how these changes can be implemented. This includes setting goals, breaking them down into manageable steps, and developing strategies for overcoming obstacles along the way. Finally, it is important to provide support throughout this process so that progress can be monitored and adjustments made as needed.

    Change work requires patience and dedication from both parties involved; however, when done correctly it can lead to lasting results. By taking time to explore underlying issues and create an actionable plan of attack, individuals are able to make meaningful improvements in their lives.

  • #20.     NLP in Business: NLP can be used in business to improve communication, increase productivity, and create a positive working environment. It involves understanding the language and behavior of employees and customers, and using it to influence their behavior.

    NLP in business can be used to improve communication, increase productivity, and create a positive working environment. It involves understanding the language and behavior of employees and customers, and using it to influence their behavior. NLP techniques such as reframing, anchoring, modeling excellence, goal setting, rapport building and more can be applied to help businesses achieve their goals. By understanding how people communicate with each other through language patterns they use or body language they display, businesses can better understand customer needs and develop strategies for meeting those needs.

    NLP also helps businesses identify areas where improvement is needed by analyzing conversations between staff members or customers. This analysis allows companies to pinpoint problems that need addressing so that solutions can be implemented quickly. Additionally, NLP provides insights into how different types of people interact with each other which helps managers make decisions about hiring new staff or developing team dynamics.

    Finally, NLP enables organizations to build strong relationships with their customers by providing them with personalized experiences tailored specifically for them. By recognizing customer preferences through natural language processing algorithms companies are able to provide services that meet individual needs while still maintaining a consistent level of quality across all interactions.